Day of the Arrow

  DAY OF THE ARROW

  PHILIP LORAINE

  VALANCOURT BOOKS

  Day of the Arrow by Philip Loraine

  First published London: Collins, 1964

  First Valancourt Books edition 2015

  Reprinted from the 1st U.S. edition (M.S. Mill, 1964)

  Copyright © 1964 by the Estate of Robin Estridge

  Published by Valancourt Books, Richmond, Virginia

  http://www.valancourtbooks.com

  All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the copying, scanning, uploading, and/or electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher constitutes unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher.

  Cover by Lorenzo Princi

  1

  The Faithless Wife

  The woman was coming out of a room at the far end of the corridor. He could never decide, later, whether he had known then and there that it was Françoise; when she turned her head a second later and he saw her face there was not quite the punch of shock that there ought to have been; for this reason he thought that some sixth sense had warned him in the fraction of a moment before her turning.

  A man followed her out of the room and shut the door. They smiled at each other, and he took her arm.

  James Lindsay stepped back into shadow and shut his eyes. He had always expected that one day, at a corner, wind blowing, or under trees in the evening, he would see Françoise again; there had been no feeling of shock; a sixth sense had lulled him so that he was completely unprepared for the straight left to the jaw—or perhaps, more exactly, the knee jab in the groin: Françoise coming out of a bedroom in the Hotel National et Nord with a lover.

  He glanced at them again as they turned out of the corridor towards the elevator. Oh yes, a lover. No doubt about that.

  He realized that he was clutching the key of his room so hard that it was hurting his hand. He released it, lifted it up and looked at it. The key, even more than what his eyes had seen, seemed to sum up the situation; summed it up with all the cruel finality of inanimate objects, which will not, like the human mind, adapt themselves to soft answers. It was a large brass key attached by a brass chain to an oval disc on which was the number of the room. The number was engraved very large as if in preparation for the succession of more or less intoxicated eyes which were going to come stumbling in out of the Parisian night in search of it. The key was battered; it had seen life since its Edwardian birth.

  Françoise and the man had reached the elevator and were hopefully pressing buttons; but the elevator was of the same period as the key; at that age you do not answer at once and when you do, you are not in a hurry. So that a new line of thought had time to slip into James Lindsay’s reeling brain. He was, in fact and humanlike, just searching about for some easy excuse when the battered brass key, at which he was still gazing witlessly, informed him that women like Françoise de Montfaucon, Marquise de Bellac, do not in fact use hotels like the National et Nord for any purpose that is not illicit. The difference, this key informed Lindsay, between himself and Françoise was that, whereas he could not afford to stay in a better hotel, she could not afford to be seen in one; it was at this point that anger took over. He could hear the whining and groaning of the ancient elevator which had at last bestirred itself, but which, like all old hotel servants, was not going to let its trouble go unappreciated. What James Lindsay did next was not gentlemanly and certainly not by any social standard Parisian. He acted, moreover, before there was time to consider. He marched out of his protecting shadow into the corridor, turned right down the passage that led to the elevator, and reached it at exactly the moment when the man was opening the gate for Françoise. She did not therefore see him at all until she had walked into the contraption and had turned. By this time Lindsay and her friend were bowing to each other on a who-precedes-whom basis.

  All right, thought Lindsay, I’m a bastard. What of it? He looked up as he stepped into the elevator, and met her eyes.

  Her eyes had not changed. He thought again as he had thought so often in the past, Well, if the eyes are really the mirror of the soul, this woman’s soul is deep, pure and beautiful; they were dark brown eyes, both exciting and soothing, critical and forgiving. She was clearly horrified to see him at this moment and in these circumstances, yet all that showed of her emotion was a sudden lifelessness. He thought, For her, this is what they call ‘a small death.’ That was how she looked—as if, suddenly and momentarily, she had died or been turned to stone. She said nothing. Her gentleman friend had by now wrestled the gates shut and was pressing the button which should, if all went well, deliver them to the ground floor.

  Knowing that he would now turn to her, and apparently unable to actually remove her eyes from Lindsay’s face—much to his gratification—she simply shut them. A second later the man did turn; he said, ‘You’re tired.’ His tone was gentle, his accent unmistakably that of The Arrondissement. Lindsay looked at him and could not, with the best will in the world, dislike what he saw: elegant, charming, not too handsome, but with that catlike self-assurance which he envied so much in Frenchmen; it came, he always imagined, from a youth spent in a world where the family was still the pivotal point, the center of the universe, a fortress of love, all protecting—instead of the kind of incompetently run youth hostel it had become in America and England. If Françoise had to take a lover, this man, damn him, was undoubtedly the right one.

  She did not open her eyes again until the elevator had shuddered to a problematical standstill more or less on a level with the ground floor. The gates were opened; she walked out; her friend followed. Lindsay suddenly felt as if he were an air-inflated man and somebody had just taken out the cork.

  He followed them more slowly towards the door, wondering whether all energy would perhaps desert him before he reached it, causing him to flop, an inert rubber bag roughly the shape of a man, onto the chill marble floor. He managed however to reach the street and, narrowly missing a motor-scooter, the Bar-Tabac on the other side of it.

  After a few minutes the cognac took a grip of his stomach and shook some sense into it. He became aware of the altercation, about football, of course, going on at the other end of the zinc counter, of the idiotic bouncing lights of the pinball machine against the wall, of his own face, reflected—appropriately, he thought—among rows of bottles behind the bar.

  He said to himself, ‘She doesn’t like fair men—that’s the answer.’

  He knew, naturally, that it was not the answer, but he was hurt as well as dismayed by the encounter. What in heaven’s name was she doing, anyway? She had succeeded in marrying the man she adored—not only handsome, not only rich, not only titled, but one of the most charming and kindly people in the world. Of course, in his young days he had been involved with a long line of beautiful girls. Could it be that he . . . ? The idea of Philippe de Montfaucon’s being unfaithful to Françoise was as unreal as the idea of Françoise being unfaithful to him. And yet, there, across the road in the Hotel National et Nord . . . Lindsay shook his head at the bottles.

  Her lover was dark, too. He brooded over this for a time, gazing distastefully at the fair reflection among the bottles: fair, square and perhaps rather stupid-looking—handsome in its way, but a bit thick. He nodded at the reflection and ordered another cognac; that was it—a bit of a numbskull. It was a pity, because he was not really a numbskull at all.

  James Lindsay at thirty was a promising young painter—or rather a ‘promising young painter,’ for such a description should never be without its inverted commas. Only two
years ago, though no less promising, he had been entirely unknown; his success, for success it was, still surprised him; not that he had been unaware of his own talent, but he had always supposed that it would go unnoticed for at least fifty years. And then two paintings in an exhibition by the Belsize Park Group (he had never lived in Belsize Park, but was said to have affinities with the group; what the affinities were he did not know)—two paintings and one enthusiastic critic, and suddenly there was Mr. F. J. Stein of the Vaga Galleries asking if he had enough stuff for a show of his own. Enough! He had a bed-sitter full of them. It was now that total unreality set in: forty pictures sold out of fifty-one, and a gentleman called Ted Hathaway—one of those perpetually angry old American writers—asking him to illustrate his book, Europe at Sunset.

  And that was the reason for his being in Paris at all; it was the first capital at which Mr. Hathaway had aimed his guns. After which, Berlin, Rome, Athens, Madrid. . . .

  James Lindsay, at thirty, knew that he was a lucky young man. He could hardly believe that only three years ago he had been teaching ‘Art’ (sic) to the disinterested sons of the new rich at Broadways Preparatory School—and, two weeks later, after a battle royal with the headmaster, washing cups in a coffee shop.

  At thirty, also, he could feel that he had vindicated his physical appearance, which, at twenty, had been his despair. At parties in attics, with glasses and girls all over the floor, no one had taken his aspirations seriously—least of all the girls. Youth being the most conservative of institutions, it was impossible for this chunky, pink-faced, fair-haired refugee from a football field to be a creative artist. Creative artists just did not look like that, and everybody knew it. He was not unpopular; indeed many of the girls had thought that in various explicit ways he had more to offer them than the tall, lank, dank and sallow young men whose work they admired. Often he would find himself struggling on divans in darkened rooms when all he wanted to do was discuss Modigliani and Proust until dawn.

  And then—for he had studied for two years at the Sorbonne—he had met Françoise. . . .

  ‘Monsieur Leensseye?’

  He turned, thinking how improbable his name sounded in French, and found one of the elderly porters of the Hotel National et Nord (same age as the elevator) looking up at him.

  ‘I saw you cross the street,’ said this ancient.

  Lindsay nodded. He had stayed many times at the hotel; he knew the porters; they had lobster eyes on stalks; they missed nothing.

  ‘Telephone,’ said the porter.

  Lindsay’s stomach contracted. He had arrived in Paris that morning. None of his friends knew that he was there. Only one person had seen him. As if to echo this thought the porter, putting on a weary archness reserved for British and American visitors to Paris, said, ‘A lady.’

  Lindsay nodded again. For five years he had not seen Françoise, had not heard from her or of her. For five years he had known at the back of his mind that somewhere they would meet again, somewhere light would catch that faultlessly molded cheek, or he would hear the unmistakable laugh in a crowded room. Well, it had happened; and it had happened well and truly. There are people with whom you know you are involved—not just for a day or a year, but forever: until death; and very possibly beyond it; in fact there is no need even to see them again because the involvement is in one’s own being. These people mark you and become part of you.

  James Lindsay followed the porter back across the street to the hotel.

  ‘Hullo. James?’ She sounded as if she had been running; also she spoke in a curiously hushed voice as if in a public place.

  He said, ‘Yes.’

  Silence. He could hear her breathing. He could see, in his mind’s eye, the lovely face framed by the fur collar of that coat. It was funny that he had not even looked at her clothes, and yet, now, he could see the faultless coat for which Givenchy or possibly Balenciaga had fined her something over a thousand dollars.

  At last she said, ‘James, I must see you.’

  The urgency of this after five years’ silence made him laugh. Françoise was not the sort of woman to whom this laugh had to be explained.

  ‘No,’ she said. ‘You must know how it is. I never . . .’

  ‘Thought of me?’

  ‘I have often thought of you, but not . . . Foolish of me, because . . . because you are one of the few people I have ever known who might be able to help me now.’

  Suddenly he recognized something very shocking in her voice. He recognized it because he had once heard it before—on a foggy night six years ago when she had come hammering at his door at two in the morning; she had been to a party; there had been no taxis; crossing the Pont Royal a man had grabbed her from behind, had tried to rape her. What Lindsay had heard then, what he heard now, was the raw edge of terror.

  ‘What’s the matter? Are you in trouble?’

  ‘No. Yes . . . Please, where can I see you? When?’

  ‘Anytime. Anywhere.’ And he did not resist the desire to add, ‘As always.’

  Again there was silence. She was thinking.

  ‘After your dinner,’ he suggested, not altogether tactfully but with intention.

  ‘Yes, we are having dinner.’

  ‘I should hope so; he looked civilized.’

  Sharply Françoise said, ‘Don’t be provincial—it doesn’t suit you.’

  He grimaced to himself, knowing he had deserved this. ‘How about the Univers?’

  ‘Very well.’ She did not like this personal game—the Uni­vers was where they had last seen each other. Lindsay was a little ashamed of himself, but only a little. ‘Very well. The Univers—at eleven. You . . . will be there?’

  ‘Nothing,’ said Lindsay, ‘could stop me.’

  She replaced the receiver. The click said more plainly than words, ‘You are being insufferable, but as I need your help it is not for me to say so.’

  Yet it was Lindsay himself who regretted his own choice of a meeting place. The Univers, cheap and noisy, pulsating with life and youth, had not changed; but he had changed. He paused on the other side of the street, looking at the big café, at the students spilling in and out of it, shouting to each other, clasping each other, fixing their personalities one upon the other with the devastating frankness of youth, as if they meant to suck each other dry of every thought or emotion that was in them. It was like an ant heap; it contained, for him, the same mysterious but ceaseless motion, alien creatures going about a business that was particularly theirs and nothing whatever to do with him.

  He found a small and untenanted table with some difficulty and, as he sat down, thought a little wryly of Françoise entering this house of young bears—the Marquise in her Balenciaga or whatever it was.

  But of course he was wrong. France is a civilized country and a beautiful woman is always a beautiful woman. Some of the young girls grimaced to each other over the coat, and some of the young men turned to look at her with appreciation. Françoise herself entered the place in exactly the same way that she would have entered Maxim’s or a café in Les Halles—conscious that she was going to be admired.

  As she sat down she said, ‘It was clever of you to think of this place; everyone is too interested in their own conversations to bother with ours.’

  They looked at each other. Lindsay noticed for the first time that there were lines of strain round her eyes—slight, revealing puckering of the muscles. She was more beautiful than she had been five years ago; time had perfected the modeling of brow and cheeks and chin, smoothing away the last blurred planes of young girlhood.

  ‘Well?’ she asked. ‘How much have I changed?’

  Lindsay smiled. ‘We were sitting about here . . .’ He looked round. ‘Yes, just about here one night; I remember telling you . . . Heavens, the things one says at that age! I remember saying that I felt as if I were attached to you by my umbilical cord. You gave me a funny feeling in the guts then, and you still do. How’s that?’

  ‘I’d say . . .’ She ex
amined him. ‘I’d say you’d been drinking cognac before dinner, and then had a whole bottle of wine all to yourself.’

  He nodded. ‘How else do you prepare to meet the only woman you’ve ever been in love with—really in love—when you know she has a husband, children, I suppose . . .’

  ‘Two.’

  ‘A title, a lot of money and an attractive lover.’

  ‘You’re not very kind to me.’

  ‘You weren’t very kind to me.’

  Françoise considered this. ‘Have you ever considered why I wasn’t . . . kind—how awful!—to you.’

  ‘Oh, I know why. You were in love with Philippe; I didn’t have a chance really. Just as you’re in love with whatever his name is, now.’

  Françoise let him order coffee for her; she never took her eyes off him. When the waiter had gone away she leaned forward. ‘No, James, you are wrong—wrong, I mean, about Daniel.’

  ‘Ah yes, Daniel. Of course. It would be.’

  She ignored this. ‘I was in love with Philippe; perhaps I still am.’

  The look that she flashed up at him from under lowered lids made Lindsay bite back the acid retort that this remark seemed to him to deserve. Instead he said, ‘Forgive me, but I really have heard that one before.’

  She nodded. ‘I find your . . . scorn difficult to take, James.’

  ‘I’m sorry. I’m jealous.’

  Françoise looked away from him. Her voice when she spoke again was flat and colorless. ‘I always could speak to you. I . . . I’m going to tell you something I’ve never told anyone else. Philippe and I have been married six years. For three years he . . . he hasn’t touched me; he hasn’t come near my bed; he doesn’t even sleep in the same room.’

  Lindsay had leaned forward, eyes wide.

  ‘Can a woman, a normal, healthy woman who has been awakened sexually . . . ? Up to three years ago our relationship was as perfect as could be; I think perhaps we were more like lovers than a husband and wife. Can a woman to whom this has happened be blamed for taking a lover—even one she does not . . . love?’ She looked up at him and her eyes were bleak; through them he looked into the arctic world of her loneliness, and what he saw caught at his heart.